you have no idea how i feel inside today. everyday my world crumbles and today is no exception.i feel smaller each day and i deem myself worthless. the hardest part is knowing that what you hoped for can never be, that no matter what you do it will never happen and you feel so helpless and downright sad. i feel so miserable and i do not even know when this will end or will it?....everyday it feels like i cannot take it anymore.it is such an effort to keep my head up and high, to keep my head above the mess that i had made. i am totally tired, i want to give up but i still have no courage to let go. i don't even remember anymore the last time i had a real hearty laugh. each morning i wake up to a gloomy day. it is always raining anywhere i walk , clouds always loom in the sky and i have not felt the sun shine on me for quite some time now. i only live for today and what does that make me?...
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